Last night I was in the moment where I am sleeping but still awake...hazy, total relaxation, just on the edge of really dozing off into a slumber of beauty when I hear my dad's laugh. I HEARD IT! Somewhere in my mind or in my heart, I'm not sure where really. Although I was in that suspended state I knew I had to hold on as long as I could because maybe, just maybe, I could make it happen again.
For those of you who don't know me and are reading this, my dad is dead. He died this past August and I watched it happen. It was years in the making but time never prepares you for a loved ones end days.
This is my dad and Ry Guy (my crazy oldest son who hasn't yet been properly introduced but more on him at a later date)~
I willed and willed to just hear his laugh one more time as I laid so still in that in between state of reality and dream but it didn't happen. I have been talking to him since the day he left and I always thought I would hear his answers but I never do. Actually hearing him last night was upsetting and comforting. It was upsetting because I miss that laugh but comforting because maybe he isn't sitting around waiting to give me an answer to my latest stupid question. I have solace in knowing that where he is, he is laughing...and maybe he is reading my blog. :)
Fondly ~ SumSum
*HUGS*
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