Today's Special!

TODAY'S SPECIAL ~ Crazy with a shot of More Crazy

Tuesday

How not to make an asshole...

I have no special instructions on such an accomplishment but rather this is a call for advice.  How does one make a boy child turn into a grown ass man without the hole?  Don't get me wrong, my guy is better than average (that's in case he reads this) but like most men has random and sometimes extended stays into assholedness.   Sometimes I push him to it and some days he just takes the trip there on his own.  From what I find 99.9% of women can say the same.  Sometimes they are selfish assholes, absent assholes, deaf assholes, worthless assholes, polio ridden assholes, drunk assholes, dumb assholes but all with one thing in common ASSHOLES.  So, if it is common knowledge that most (if not all) men are assholes then how do I make sure my sweet little baby boys don't wind up with the same nickname whispered by their wives as she takes another load of laundry up the stairs as he sits and watches UFC 1500?  I think it's impossible, all of our sons will wind up being assholes.  We won't think they are just like our MIL's don't think their sons are but they will be.  So, instead of a call for advice I guess this has progressed into an apology to my future daughter in laws.  I'm sorry that you are such bitches that drive my sweet baby boys into assholedness.  Maybe if you would serve dinner a little bit warmer next time or rub his feet before bed he wouldn't treat you like the son stealing twat that you are.

Fondly ~ SumSum

3 comments:

  1. I wonder that too Sum....you hit the nail on the head!

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  2. AHAHAHA! my boy is two, and though he is cute as hell, i have the same fears. He is just like his dad, but shorter and cuter, and his dad at at least three of the aforementioned kind of assholes.
    my friend, (who is very kind and sweet), has a full-fledged ten year old asshole even though she thought she could avoid it by "starting from scratch."

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  3. This is like THE question of life isn't it? Hmm... all jokes aside I guess all you can do is teach them what you know (which is to be a good person I'm sure) and hope for the best. If all else fails terrify them with Ghetto Spongebob! :) *smooches!*

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