Today's Special!

TODAY'S SPECIAL ~ Crazy with a shot of More Crazy


It's been a while...

This plate directs those that pull behind it to "NVESTIT".  Now, I am not an expert on motorized vehicles but if I am going to take financial advice from a license plate I think it should probably be from a car a little more on the expensive side.  If this plate was attached to say a Bentley then perhaps I would have arrived at work and immediately revised my 401k portfolio but dude, you are driving a Pontiac GTO.  It would be different if this was the GTO The Beach Boys sang about but no, it still has that new car smell you can tell.  Maybe I am way off base here and what this guy is trying to say is that instead of pissing his money away on frivolous things like hot rod road hogs he chose to purchase a more feminine, economical, glorified Cavalier.  Which leads me to an entirely different topic.  Some cars should only be driven by the female population and I am going to add the Pontiac GTO made in a year that begins with a 20 to that list.  So, if you consider yourself a manly dude that is single and ready to mingle consider this a free PSA:

1. Pontiac Sunfire - this car is the biggest offender in my book but if yours is purple you might need to turn in your man card or just come out already.
2. Cavalier - the only time you should drive this is if it belongs to the chick you are dating and it doesn't make a difference if you have a garter hanging from the rearview.
3. VW Bug - old school or the newer version with the cute little flower vase on the dash, run away
4. Pontiac GTO that currently still has a warranty
5. Dodge Neon - over sized roller skate, seriously
6. Geo - any make or model and you shouldn't even be able to fit in one unless your last name is Roloff
7. Mini Van of any shape or size and you are not either a) married, b) a dad or c) working at a daycare

So fellas, if you are starting any of the above engines and have hopes of getting laid in the near future you need to place a 'RENTAL' sticker on the side and explain to any potential wifey that your super charged, super manly, hot rod from heaven is in the shop because it keeps breaking down from pure awesomeness.

1 comment:

  1. Love the new look at title! :)

    Also, if you want to add silver HHR (aka bread box) to that list, I will not tell Dave and will not be offended. lol. He loves that thing!