- When someone asks what I am having for lunch I am going to say, "Dinner regurgitated from last night."
- When they don't believe me and walk over to my cubicle to see what I'm really having I will have a plastic baggy of chewed up bread/chips/chicken sitting on my desk and offer them a sample. (I learned that baggy trick from Intervention, thank you A&E)
- The next time I am in the restroom and another individual enters the stall next to me I'm going to ask who it is and whether they have answered me or not I'm going to say, "mmm hmm, I've heard of you"
- I'm going to have conversations with coworkers while my eyes are completely closed.
- If someone asks for my assistance I am going to state that I really don't have time but know someone that does, I will then reach into my desk drawer and pull out a sock puppet who will proceed from there.
- I am going to talk to myself so loud that the folks around me think I am talking to them...oh wait, I already do this...moving on.
- Every task I complete I am going to yell out, "Woot Woot...in your face task, how does it feel to be done task, shove it up your ass to-do list!"
- Take naps
- Start a show and tell that I will hold at my cubicle...just for me. "For show and tell today Summer I brought a water bottle that holds 24 total oz's of aqua." "Wow Summer that is fascinating and very hydrating."
Wednesday
Things I'm going to start doing at the office...1st edition
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LOVE #5 & #7!!!! #8 I already do - but sadly not in the winter/early spring b/c it's too cold, and only over lunch. I do however, have a coworker who naps right at her desk at any given point in the day, and doesn't even position herself so that it looks like she's working. She just lays her head back and snoozes at her desk. She also watches TV (General Hospital, etc) most of the day. Nobody ever says anything to her about it either... maybe you could get away with it. Especially if you're union.
ReplyDeleteOh Lord, there is a herd of women that sit in our community kitchen and watch the soaps from like noon to 2pm...they get aggravated when you come in to use the microwave or get a glass of water because you are interrupting their "stories"...the last person to refer to soaps as "stories" was my grandma who was 70 million years old...
ReplyDeletehahahaha. I might have to do some of these at work. I especially love the, conversation with your eyes closed, and the sock puppet.
ReplyDeleteOh! - My! - Gosh!.....I SO wanna work slong side of you so I can watch you do all this funny stuff....I picture myself sitting in the next cubicle - ducking down/hiding, with my hand covering my mouth to keep from laughing hysterically..... You're a Riot!
ReplyDeleteThis list is yet another reason I think you are awesome- I have an "award" for you at my blog simply for being your awesome self.
ReplyDeleteAMo
http://princessmuffintop.blogspot.com/